I keep thinking…”Tomorrow will be easier, tomorrow will be better.” But then tomorrow comes with new chaos and anxieties that I did not expect and it’s not easier, it’s not better…and I am barely holding it together with a toddler crawling on me at every minute of the day and night. ( AND YES, I know I will miss the days she is this little, and needed me every second of every day, but damn this is hard.)
I did not feel this overwhelmed the week we brought her daughter home, and I had a punctured spinal chord with a headache that made it that I could not even hold her to feed her because my back and arms would seize up and I would almost drop her.
THAT was easier.
There is no playbook for this, living life during a pandemic. There is no road map to guide you through working from home while your toddler is begging for your attention, you cant ask siri for the answer. What we have are educated guesses, and praying that we guessed right. I dont have it together. I am struggling. Every. Single. Day. And I am an introvert.
Guys this is hard.
But that’s okay. Because I keep getting up. I keep doing my absolute best under the circumstances.
We are thankful for our home. We are thankful that we both have our jobs. We are thankful for the essential personal making great sacrifices for us at home. We are thankful we are together. We will get to the other side of this.